I Now Miss What I Once Hated

Never in my wildest dreams would I ever think I would actually miss having an aide. Funny how situations can change so very unexpectedly.

4.5 years ago when due to surgery gone wrong left me #paralyzed, in a #wheelchair and unable to do most anything for myself, it became clear that I would need an aide with me while my honey was at work, I simply HATED 😠 the idea of having someone in my home but I had no choice.

What I can say is, that after several terrible experiences with CNAs (Certified Nurses Aides), I accidently came across a woman looking for extra money. She was NOT a CNA or a HHA (Home Health Aide), she was an average woman, who happened to live in my condo complex, who became more like a friend. It was through her, Lynda, that I realized I could somewhat accept having someone in my home every day while my honey was at work. With Lynda living in the same complex, it was easy for her to walk over and help me a bit, get me a cup of coffee and did some light cleaning like vacuuming, dusting, etc. and then she would leave me alone for a while, which helped me a great deal to feel more “normal.” Sadly, Lynda moved out of state, it was then I decided I would ONLY look to hire someone that was NOT a CNA or HHA. I then found Nancy, who insisted she “was an extension of me” insisting she would do the things I wanted to do but was no longer able to do such as decorate my home, wrap gifts and even run small errands. After a little over a year, Nancy needed more financial stability than I was able to give so I was once again looking for a NON CNA/HHA. Next came Tasha, a sweet, soft spoken Jamaican woman who was shy at first but willing to do whatever I needed including helping my mother a few times. Once again, after only a little more than a year, our time together was over, this time due to #COVID19. 🦠

In mid March 2020 my honey started working from home 🏡 as did many others. At that time, I was thrilled! Don’t get me wrong, I’m still thrilled, I love having him home but as the holidays approach and the gifts I ordered for him start arriving in the mail, another harsh reality slaps me in the face.

I can no longer wrap my honey’s Christmas presents 😢🎁 I can no longer place a piece of my honey’s favorite peppermint bark in his stocking Yes, one of my cousins offered to come and wrap his gifts and yes I certainly could ask her to pick up some peppermint bark, but for some reason the reality of me not doing those things hit me hard this year.

I miss Lynda, Nancy and Tasha. I didn’t know it at the time, but while they were here with me, they helped me feel more “normal” by doing and getting the things I no longer can do and, to their credit, each of them did things for me and got things for me all in a manor that never felt like a “job” or “chore” but more like they were helping a friend, me, for which I will always be grateful.

As always, I wish you days filled with – take a minute to WONDER what it is that made you smile today!

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One thought on “I Now Miss What I Once Hated

  1. Im thrilled you had people in your life that made you feel that way. its great that you found those people to help you out. Keep moving forward because if you look back it just slows you down. Much love JO

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